Progress report

My anxiety level is much better tonight than it has been all week.  I no longer feel the constricting palpitations below my heart.  I only slept last night until a little after one.  I've tried keeping the lights turned off when I wake, willing myself back to sleep, but my mind is racing and my heart is leaping (I know this is disgusting, but I have to pee almost every hour anyway, so I have to get out of bed!!!).  Today, I've read two books, written a bit, attended a meeting, eaten lunch with a group of people, socialized (both times in places surrounding food) for a good amount of time, and abstained from bingeing.  I need to join a gym, though, or sign-up for a yoga/pilates class before I do return to my previous patterns.  I did come home tonight, though, and have pleasure in eating some kidney beans.  I can remember a similar feeling in Ridgeview where I looked forward to meal times and actually enjoyed the pleasure of eating.

Why can't I get better and still lose weight?  HA!